A common question I’m asked by clients, particularly working parents, is: “How do I get my work/life balance right? If I did that, things would be sorted and my life would be easy!”
I also see organisations implementing structures like flexible working hours, to help staff manage the pressures of home and work life. Such supports are useful, necessary even, but can also be a trigger for self judgement. If you don’t remove the underlying fear around the perception of the perfect ‘work/life balance’ equation, it’s yet another thing that triggers self-judgement and reproach. “Other people [look like they] are doing it, why not me?”
It’s easy to buy into a linear model that says: I have only this much time and I have to fit in all these things to make it work!
“Quick! I have to stop work now, race home and get the kids, oh and now it’s date night, so I have to stop with the kids and pretend I’m interested!! “
Exhausting isn’t it.
Well the truth is, life is not about balance, in fact, life is constantly out of balance!
Life is about Flow. The most fulfilled and successful people know how to find their calm, grounded centre and stay in the flow. Fear and judgement don’t get a toehold.
Think of it this way: the Apollo 13 mission finally reached the moon, but not via a single straight line. They were constantly off course, trouble shooting and problem solving, with Houston support and sometimes by the seat of their pants, but they did navigate back to centre and home safely.
Our life is like that – constantly re-centering ourselves, yet staying true to our intention. Some days you have to spend more time with the kids while at other times, work is your focus, or health, or marriage. Staying centred, present, in the moment and following the energy, you’ll find you will accomplish all you have to each week, enjoy being on the task at hand and not judge yourself because you didn’t spend ‘enough’ time on this or that.
If you don’t believe me, give it a go. You’ll be amazed and so much more fulfilled!
Bodhi Aldridge is a Senior Coach and mentor. Having run a successful legal practice for many years, he has turned his professional experience to supporting people seeking more in their career and personal life and who are interested in a holistic approach to life and work.
Bodhi has extensive experience in commercial matters, in building business and supporting people to get product to market. Having also committed extensively to his own personal development, he’s supported many clients to create sustainable cultural change personally and in their careers and management.
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